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I can't breathe.

Those are the word George Floyd said when a policeman put his full weight on his neck.

I'm sure you've seen the images, the video and the words 'I can't breathe' and it makes me feel physically sick. I cried for a full day after reading his story.

This is not my usual blog post but I express myself best through words and need to get this out.

My Twitter is split in half. It's either Black Lives Matter or Hey let's talk about publishing and right now the publishing side is the least of my concerns. My heart feels so heavy and black people are tired. Let me explain why.

1. Ahmed Aubery went for a run in Georgia and was followed by two white men who shot and killed him.

Their defence: They had multiple burglaries in the area and assumed the jogger was the person.

Verdict: Arrested weeks later ONLY after the video went viral and people shouted about it.

2. Christian Cooper was bird watching in Central Park, New York and asked a white lady to put her dog on a le…
Recent posts

My book cover is now out! Isn't she pretty?

Sooo how are we all doing? I legit don't even know what week of lockdown this is, I just know that I am over it. I didn't even realise that I just miss working in different environments that is not my house. I'm pretty good at self-motivating myself but for the past few days I've just had this what is the point attitude. The problem is I run quite a few companies so as much as I want to live in lazy town I can't!

The good news is the Government have issued a small companies loan that we should be able to get. That will be a massive help seeing as bookshops are still closed. I feel so bad for those who have books that had to be pushed back or published via ebook first. It's not ideal but I love when people still push on ahead. And we've come out of the peak! Hopefully everyone can be that little bit more patient so we don't get a second peak.

My book cover is now out! Isn't she pretty? I just wanted pure fire and I got it! Ale Artigas is my amazing …

You have to protect your mind. Remember this will come to an end.

We are on week 2 of lockdown in London. Hoping everyone is doing okay! I work remotely so not much has changed for me. Walking down the road is a trip. It's literally a ghost town and finding toilet roll and pasta is like stumbling across a pot of gold. I miss seeing my mates, church and driving! I literally volunteer to go to the shops just so I can drive! The lockdown had to happen though. When I was driving to the shop I could see bare people in the park just laying down, sunbathing and me and everyone in the cars were just staring at them like wtf?! But despite all the crap the lockdown has made me very appreciative of my health, my family, that I have a garden to all least go for run in without people breathing on me. I am bored enough that I'm messing about with filters on Instagram. My uncle and cousins have natural blue eyes so it's defo my mum that ruined the gene.

The publishing world is slowly closing down and loads of books are being delayed. We haven't be…

...yes I did say his name in the mirror 5 times. Does that mad man need to be resurrected?

Good news! Remember in my last blog I had two parking fines? And one went up because they claimed I never paid but I did? So I called up to pay over the phone and the payment literally was pending in my account for a week—basically the council couldn't be bothered to take out the money. So now I'm really annoyed as this is the second time I tried to pay for this damn parking. I called up, spoke to this lovely girl who asks me when I got the letters. Turns out I didn't have my full days to pay so they lowered it back down to £65. I will take £65 over £130 anyway so was happy with that!

And the good news keeps on rolling! I literally had the worst start to the year. It felt like every day there was something crap happening to the point I wanted to quit my own company (I know!) and just doing something not publishing related. I kept praying about it and I felt in my soul everything was going to work out but you know when you're just like WHEN??? Well my book is in the fi…

'Do you look at my Instagram and think I need money?'

I'm late to the party but HAPPY NEW YEAR!! My start to the year has been up and down but working through the downs so they have become ups (if that makes sense). There is something so annoying about January. I think I've had one good January where everything just went smoothly. Yeah I would love those times to come back.

Started of the New Year with not one but two parking fines. I just can't with this. One of them you can't even see my car and they're like it's defo you. How?? And then the other one literally suspended my entire road so then I had to park up the road. The next day or maybe the day after they suspended that road and gave me a fine. I said they should have said days prior that the road was going to be suspended and given warning. They claimed they did. THEY DIDN'T. So then I paid the stupid fine and then got a letter the other say saying I didn't pay it. I am so over these idiots.

I feel like this year everyone has the mentality of savi…

2019. Well where do I start?

Happy New Year! I felt like the heatwave went on forever and then suddenly we're at New Years Eve. This year has been full of surprises -  good and bad but God is so good that all the bad ended up working in my favour. I feel like last year taught me loads about myself but this year taught me about business.  I have hired and fired, I have a lawsuit against someone, Hashtag Press turned two but with that came lots of bumps that had me and Helen like WTF?! But we overcame it all. Emily Knight I am...Awakened literally blew my mind with the awards - Carnegie, London's Big Read, The People's Book Prize. I got nominated for a Black British Business Award. I didn't end up signing Beats with any of the publishing houses. If it's not a big house it makes no sense for me to sign as I have my own one. I started on a new fantasy series that I am obsessed with and Emily Knight I am...Becoming is out in 2020. I spoke to producers and I finally understand this whole film adapt…

...but my hair was in such a state that I couldn't do it to myself.

Next week we will be in 2020. How crazy is that? I hope everyone had a great Christmas. Mine was good. I got stuck doing the cooking again! But there was no arguing so a success! It's always so strange that gap between Christmas and New Years because I feel like there's all this stuff I want to do before the year is up and yet just chilling out has been the best. This break has been so overdue and I am really loving just moving at this glacier speed. I told myself I would have finished my new book by the end of the year...yeah I love how ambitious I am! I haven't worked on it since I've had my break.

I just clocked this morning that my third book is out in just over 9 months. Why that gives me anxiety I have no idea! I am debating whether to have a book launch party. I just don't know if I can be asked to organise it. Next year is already looking full on. Grrrr I just need another me really.

I was thinking about my highlights for the year and one of them was defo …